impossible_laboratoriesfandomcom-20200213-history
Impossible Laboratories Wiki
"Impossible Laboratories- where the Impossible becomes Possible!" Welcome to the Impossible Laboratories Database! Hello and welcome to the Impossible Laboratories database! Impossible Laboratories is a multi-universal corporation established to advance the field of science and to better mankind by exploring the deep reaches of reality. To apply to become a member of the ever-expanding Impossible Laboratories team, please fill out an application (found on the Getting Started page) and submit it to an administrator for approval. Impossible Laboratories is an equal opportunities employer. A Helpful Reminder All files submitted to the database MUST be approved by an administrator before said file can be validated. Administrators reserve the right to remove any files they deem improper, in accordance with the Administrator Act of 1994. If you have any questions, comments or concerns, please contact an administrator or bring it up in the forum. Here is a list of administrators that can help with any problem you might encounter: *Dr. Zachary Harrison *Albert Langston Company News Bulletin *News of REDACTED has caused company stock to fall to an all time low of 0.03 points. If you would like to resign due to the crisis, you are at liberty to contact an approved Human Resources Director. *New Dress Code "Business Formal": All personnel are required to wear button-up shirts, khaki pants and some sort of tie. *The Cubicle Captain of Sector 7D will be on vacation and is being temporarily replaced by a robot. Please refrain from hacking the robot. *''Transmission Received!'' An update has been made to the Impossible Laboratories Office Radio Transmission! Music tracks are now embedded with calming and refreshing hidden frequencies, so you can work to your full potential! *This is a reminder not to streak through any wormholes. Not only is this an illegal offense, it also has several life-threatening symptoms such as , , or even *Our thoughts and feelings go out to the family and friends of any personnel who perished in the recent Resonance Cascade Crisis in *The above message is false. Do not add false information to the Company News Bulletin. Adding false information can cost you your job, and in some cases, your life. *Due to complaints of Battle Cubes from other dimensions attacking facilities, 22 orbiting laser satellites have been installed. Please inform an administrator if the lasers do not work if and when a Battle Cube attacks. *Due to a recent series of deaths, all travel to Universe B1960 is now denied. *Radio Transmissions found on frequencies to are to be reported to level nine staff immediately. Do not attempt to make contact or pay any attention to anything said or heard on these frequencies such as "The cute puppies are through the wormhole" and "Delta station four is really *A quick reminder from Dr. ____: "Don't any of you ****ers attempt to 'simplify' the wormhole equations AND THEN ****ING USE THEM FOR ACTUAL SCIENCE! You make the equation wrong when you 'SIMPLIFY' it! Why can't any of you-''" remainder of the reminder has been removed due to unforeseen controversy. *All staff and personnel are '''required' to learn both English and Esperanto. Free learning courses will be offered. *All employees stationed in the OWU sovereign member state of Brazil must fill out Form 27B/6 before the closing of the second quarter. WARNING Impossible Laboratories is not responsible for loss of family, friends, loved ones, personal items, personal property, and/or body parts lost in or damaged by parallel universes, nor is Impossible Laboratories responsible for any accidents/incidents that occur outside the perimeters of official facilities and territories. Category:Browse